These are a few of my favorite things...

For most women, and plenty of men, shopping equals therapy. The sudden rush of a hot new outfit, or new set of wheels can temporarily take away the pain and frustrations of our current lives. I've never been a gal who will house a whole pizza because I'm upset. I'm more apt to sprint my brains out even at 3 in the morning. However, I have been known to use my credit card to try to ease the pain. While on a recent trip home to Massachusetts, I thought about some of the things I've accumulated due to heartache. While on the plane ride back- I made a list of fallen relationships and what I've rewarded myself with for surviving! And because sharing is caring... I'm blogging about it. Disclaimer: This isn't meant to be an evil blog, nor is it meant to attack those who have wronged me. I've LONG since forgiven. It's more of a "been there, done that, never again" reminder. And a pretty good list of where my savings account has gone to if you ask me. I've been advised not to write anything about my life that I wouldn't want my mother to read. Also- that I wouldn't want strangers over the world wide web to molest with their eyes. I feel I've done a great job meeting my personal venting needs and being classy as well. We all know it's only my opinion that matters anyways... wink! 

Numbah One:

High School/Pre College. Cheater Cheater Pumpkin Eater. He got a tattoo with some Chinese symbol of "loyalty" on his body. HA, Ironic? So I went and got a tattoo down my spine. That's right. 6 inches long, and 4 inches wide. Clearly I had learned bigger is better and was no longer willing to settle on the immoral souls that surrounded me. I've always loved tigers and felt the contrast between the strength of a tiger and the beauty/delicate nature of a butterfly fit my soul to a T! If you know about my moth hospital, this tattoo may open your eyes more! Surrounding my main feature are lilies. Not only is the Lily my favorite flower, but it's symbolic of innocence and purity. Why is this important? Because my name means the same thing.

Numbah Two:

Mid-Late College/Post College. Almost 3 years. Almost 2 years of living together. But Mostly Hell. I've created a hatred of blonde's because of this relationship and more importantly- ex girlfriends. It was always such a treat when we'd receive drunken 4am phone calls with new ways to improve their past relationship. New ideas to make the relationship work. And always pleading. Lots and lots of pleading and throwing oneself in front of the moving train. Oh well. Another possible cheater. Who else gets engaged to their ex girlfriend 3 months after breaking off a 3 year relationship with someone else? Told yah. Anyways- I got a puppy out of this one! Her name is Mia which means MINE in Italian. Mia is a great little pal and still glues herself to me when I fly home to Massachusetts! Now THAT is true Loyalty. It was really important that I fill my heart with someone who was going to love me regardless of my flaws. She was the girl for the job!

Numbah Three: 

Pre/partial Graduate School. Best friend. Seemingly Loyal. If you can't trust your best friend with your heart who can you trust? Goes far, far away for a long, long time. I once counted the amount of times we saw each other in the 9ish month time our relationship spent growing. Lucky number 21. During 6 of those 9 months I got 2 phone calls. Accompanied by about 1-2 emails a day. Towards the end of the relationship I'd get one every week or so. Which was mostly because he'd already started a relationship with someone else. Although he claims to have been "busy". I got my "Dear John" letter via email 5 minutes prior to my very first graduate exam. He's lucky I got a damn "A" and rocked out. I'm not sure how I held it together but I do know that not only did I find the ultimate heart mending solution- but I made some of the best friends ever out of one of the most traumatic situations my heart has been through. The loyalty that group of "strangers" showed was more than enough to help me learn more about myself. I lived in Valdosta, GA for a year and have never learned more about myself from my experiences there. What did I get out of this one? A one way ticket to Charleston, SC where I currently reside. This was also a fresh start for me. I was no longer wanting to run home for protection but felt I should throw myself into new life goals instead. I created my "Life List" of things I'd like to do or try and have been working on the list ever since!

Numbah Four:

Poor timing. Miss Communication. AWOL. Whatever. This one has a very happy ending. Actually- two very happy endings. People come into your life for a reason. Sometimes- you want them to have different reasons than the big guy has planned for you. When things didn't line up, and another relationship started while my ducks were having trouble getting in a row- I was bummed. But as time passed something much more important evolved out of the experience- a strong friendship. Loyalty and honesty still ooze from our pairing and for that I am thankful. Before I knew why we crossed paths I was really confused as to why things didn't work out. I decided that what I was personally wanting at the time was someone to spend time with, and someone to take care of. I looked into the Low Country Lab Rescue and fostered a lab pup named "Ruby." I personally hated the name and called her Pup or PupPup instead. After a long few months of sick and barely active puppy- I decided I wanted to keep her. So I adopted Nova and 5 minutes later she sprung to life and ripped up some panties. I guess I got two trusty sidekicks for the price of one! Both love panties! HA! xoxo

Mambo Numbah 5:

Live. Laugh. Love. The word heartache just sounds awful. But just because your heart broke doesn't mean it has to be an awful nasty situation. The purpose of life is to learn. Whether that be from experience, mistakes, other people, or in other facets. Learning equals growing. A year ago this week actually, I fell into the hands of one of the most heart filling experiences I may ever have. I Learned a lot. Loved a lot. Laughed a lot. And have Lived a lot because of it. I recently noticed that one thing I didn't really do was regret. I can't think of any aspect of the relationship that I had regrets on. I could have my blinders on, which I so often rock out in, but lets hope not for the sake of editing this blog! I haven't found the "perfect" purchase for this life situation but I know what it's going to be. I think it will be a painting. I think it's appropriate given some past history and I think it will be a good reminder of what I want out of life. Happiness, Love, Loyalty, Hope, Faith... and truly Living. Thank you.

Numbah 6: 

Hottest. Charming. Ambitious. Badass. And Crazy?! After 2.5 months of dating I guess its appropriate to blow off the girl you're dating and to marry a near stranger. We all make choices. Some of us don't have the backbones to choose wisely. And then there are others who make mistakes, like big ass mistakes, and refuse to get themselves out of those situations. Shame on You. Peace Out.  Since I spent 2 months eyeing hot tattoos out of this dating extravaganza I feel it is appropriate to dive into some more ink as a form of "retail" therapy. I thought about another tiger tattoo- something on my hip or in the pelvic region. But it's bathing suit season and I've been growing increasingly embarrassed of my current ink. It's almost 8 years old. It's cartoon like. And I've been wanting it redone for some time now. So I've decided to plan a personal vacation to Savannah, GA to get some new ink. Care to join? 

The number one thing I've acquired from all of these hard times is- Friends! The bonds that I have created with the people in my life has done nothing but grow stronger. I am thankful everyday for those around me that continuously swoop in when I need them most. Not only do they have to deal with my crazy life but sometimes have to help me navigate through the most painful of situations. To those I Love Most: Thank you for always doing your best to protect my heart even when I'm careless with it. Thank you for always knowing when to step in and drag me away from harm- even when I'm kicking and screaming- because I cannot do it myself. Love You, Mean it. Always, Always.