Please Come to Charleston in the Springtime....

For those of you that are not aware, or if you're completely in denial of my northern upbringing, I am a Massachusetts native. Born and raised just off the Rhode Island border in a little town that no one knew existed. Well, that is until I started roaming the earth. Anyways, while I paraded around in my Masshole skin, I attended the University of Massachusetts- aka Zoomass. I won't welcome you to the Jungle in this blog, but I will introduce you to some ladies with some amazing super glue. While these two particular ladies are not the ONLY Boston girls that I hold in my heart, they are the most recent visitors to my new home in Charleston, SC. 

Meet Suzanne. Also referred to as Questionie. Why? Because she asks a lot of questions. If you've got your new beau on the other line- don't hand her the phone or she'll threaten his life. In most of my cases- it was well deserved. But anyways. I've lost track- but Suzanne has done her fair share of finding the shattered pieces of my heart and trying to glue them together again. She's always the voice of reason, sometimes harsh reasoning, but always reasonable. She is also always kind of sparkly. It's true. Always wearing cute little do-dads. 

Meet Katie. Also referred to as Katie Treat. Why? I'm not entirely sure why but I do know that she is famous for sending me treat mail! It seems every time I've hit my new "low" I land back in Boston. She is always calm and collected in her counseling sessions. The best part is when I "land" back home- it is only a matter of time before I've got a note in my mailbox. She's always good about reminding me that I'm surely not alone in the mess I'm trying to sort out. I even get notes on Valentine's Day saying Cheers to being Single on V-Day! 

     

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And so I ask: Did they tell you WHY your plane was delayed? I never get on until they give me more information.

Suzanne: KATIE! We were supposed to ask what was wrong with the plane. (to flight attendant)- Excuse Me. Excuse Me!

Aside from almost experiencing their first tornado in the South- they arrived in one piece and off we went to the "K House." First things first- Poe's Tavern on Sullivan's Island and a follow up pitcher or two at Red's Ice House. We weren't at Poe's five minutes before Katie had fallen head over heels with Firefly Sweet Tea Vodka. Can you blame her? 

The next day we roamed around the Angel Oak Tree on Johns Island. Dined at Jim n Nicks BBQ while sipping on $3 Margaritas. We also bounced from Chais, to Moe's, to the Griffin and back to the K House for more Margaritas. I somehow conned the girls into going to the Pirate Museum/Restaurant at the old City Bar. We also took multiple tours of the harbor, downtown, and self guided tours by your favorite Boston turned Charleston Girl! We bounced around the Open Air Market, Historic King Street Shopping, The Farmer's Market and the Battery. 

Katie and Suzanne

My favorite day? Clearly "Katie Meets Sonic," and "My Birthday" night. Slated as a typical "Girls Night Out," we were only fooling ourselves thinking a night out with 6 girls from all over the country would be anything typical. I should have known when I pulled out of the Boulevard Diner in Mt. P that it was going to be a fun night. Prior to take off Katie sings "THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE, MY DREAMS ARE COMING TRUE." Then I pulled into oncoming traffic and plopped us into the suicide lane. I heard a faint gasp and then "As Karen kills us before my dreams come true" from the back of the car. In my defense- if she would have just texted her friends like she was supposed to she wouldn't have known there were cars coming. Anywho- We arrive at Sonic and the girls are euphoric over the girl on roller skates. So much so that they have their camera's ready as the poor girl skates up to deliver the goodies. I pulled the girls back into the car after they begged for autographs and quickly took them to a special spot to eat our treats.

Tell me she doesn't look HORRIFIED

I wanted the girls to see my boat ramp at Remley's Point. This is the place I go with my imaginary boat and practice backing it off the ramp. Ahem, in my Toyota Corolla. I usually then go and sit at the end of the dock and wait for my sanity to return. In typical Suzanne fashion- she makes friends with some local fisherman off the end of the pier and all but gives them the longitude and latitude coordinates of the K House. Thankfully we are used to Suzanne and the Southern Folk are used to friendly people. We then zoomed home and got ready for our Girls Night Out!

After mixing drinks and jamming to a wonderful mix I made- we were on the prowl. We landed at The Rooftop at Vendue Inn and then jumped over to the Pavillion Rooftop where Katie somehow managed to find some dudes from Boston. Typical. But good news- they bought us JagerBombs. Typical? Totally. Ok just one time I promise- jagerbomb-jagerbomb-jagerbomb! Guidos Unite! Down the elevator we go and land at The Brick (a personal fav) where we find Allison and friends! I'm in the midst of sipping my Long Island Iced Tea when the hot guitarist yells "WHERE IS KAREN?!"  Clearly I didn't think he was referring to me. Well that is until all 8 girls we were with started to point to Me. After a small out of body experience I realize they are singing Happy Birthday... to ME! So I go along with it because this isn't the first time I've celebrated my birthday in July (woot woot Erin). At the end of the song the hot guitarist wished me happy birthday... among other unmentionables. Why he didn't ask for my number when he came to hang out with us 10 minutes later is beyond me. RUDE! After all it was my f'ing birthday for crying out loud! Whatev. It was a fabulous time of dancing and singing with the girls.

Happy Birthday to ME!?!!

My favorite part of the whole trip was not to show them how much tequila I consume- but to show them what life is truly like for me. How I get to run the bridge, walk the pier, jump in the ocean, stroll past fancy boutiques, and lay under billion year old oak trees that have Michael Jackson's face poking through the bark. They also got to see WHY I run the bridge so often- my ass would blow up with all the delicious food we have here! (I did bring them places other than Sonic).  The city of Charleston is undeniably beautiful and the history can be mesmerizing with the right tour guide! 

When I dropped Katie and Suzanne off at the airport it was a sad goodbye. They were the first "back home" friends I've had visiting me! It was also scary because Katie told me I made the biggest mistake ever being a great hostess because they are going to come back again! I'm not sure why it was given in such a threatening tone but I'm boarding up my house as we speak! 

So in the meantime- I get to countdown to my next trip to Boston.... how many more days until Thanksgiving?? 

Liar, Liar, Your Pants are on Fire

"I wandered through Fiction to look for the Truth. Buried beneath all the Lies" 

-Goo Goo Dolls 

So- What's the biggest Lie you've ever told? The most earth shattering, heartbreaking, tear you up inside Lie you've ever told? 

A few weeks back I had a bunch of friends over for some drinks and good conversation prior to going out for the night. Somehow the subject of "lies" was brought up and someone asked that same question: What is the BIGGEST Lie you've ever told? Now- I will say this- Hands did not fly up in the air to volunteer! He-who-must-not-be-named volunteered the biggest lie he could think of on the spot. He told a story about a trip to Boy Scout Camp (or something) with a good friend. Along the way there they hooked their Gameboy's up and played against each other. At the end of the trip- they couldn't remember whose Gameboy was whose! One device had clearly been beaten up, the other looked brand new. So this person secretly carved his name in the battery cover of the newer Gameboy. Suddenly, "Hey Dude I just remembered- I carved my name in the battery case of my Gameboy!" 

Funny right? But life altering? Nah. Especially knowing that this person doesn't live a life of criminal behavior and constant deceit of those around him. We all do greedy or selfish things, however, some of us carry those behaviors throughout our lives. 

While I sit here and type this therapeutic piece- I cannot for the life of me think of the worst Lie I've ever told. I doubt it's because my friends and family read my blog. I'm sure there were many times I lied about cleaning my room when I shoved my toys under my bed instead. But, I think for me the biggest "lies" I've told are those things that I haven't told others. Those things I saw that I should have spoken up about. Things I've experienced but never leaked it to another ear. Or even those choices I've made and chose not to tell those whose lives were affected by my choice. Are those lies worse? Those things you don't tell the people you care about because you know it will hurt them? Is that a Lie? I'm not sure. 

Another thing I'm not sure about: Why do people Lie? What is the freaking point? Clearly I'm not talking about "little white lies" here. We've all been in situations where we had to openly confess or come forward with information that we knew would upset those the words fell on. But does it make you a hero to change the truth? Are you doing that person a favor by "shielding" them from this pain? No. People need truth. Why? Because they can't truly cope without it. Because that is what everyone searches their whole life for- Truth. You can't let someone live seconds, minutes, hours of their lives without the truth. It isn't fair. They alter their thoughts and lives based on the lie you've sold them. Then some rainy day down the road they fall face first over the truth that you've tried to protect them from. And for what? For YOU to sleep at night. For you to think you weren't the "bad guy". Or for you to feel the relief that you've gotten away without the person you love seeing the red paint on your hands. 

I work with children. Ages 3-14- sometimes higher. I get to see a good progression of lying. Generally speaking, the younger kids come right out and tattle on themselves. "I punched Johnny because he broke my crayon." Sometimes if you're lucky they'll assign themselves a punishment. Anyways, I digress. You know when they're 3 years old and lying about having gone potty in their pants. You know the truth before you ask the question. Or when they're in 2nd grade and they stole their pals bouncy ball- the smirk is usually a tell tale sign. But how do they progress from the smirk to lying to your face? How does it become such an acceptable thing? What is so acceptable about wronging someone you care about? I guess maybe that's the real question- Do you care enough about them to choose to do the right thing? To avoid temptation? To protect them by NOT wronging them? Or is it just human nature- some innate part of all of us?

Who knows. I do know that it would be much easier if people's pants really caught on fire after they told a big Lie! So if you've lied about where you've been, who you've been with, what you were doing, how long you've been doing it, how you feel, or if you've held back answers to someone's unasked questions- knowing they need to hear the words... I hope you choose to be honest. I hope you choose to tell the truth. Maybe the pain it takes to speak those words will help you to make better decisions in the next round. To avoid hurting those you love by making the right choice the first time. We've only got so many moments in life- we might as well live them the honest way. 

Next Question: What is the nicest thing you've ever done for someone? The most heart filling, ground shaking, mountain moving, life changing thing you've ever done for someone? 

Having trouble? Maybe that should tell us something....

"So live like you mean it. Love 'til you feel it. It's all we need in our lives." 

- "Before it's too Late"  By: Goo Goo Dolls

We're Sleeping in the Streets....

I Wear My Sunglasses At Night

Even though I currently have the summer off- I just love counting down to the weekend! Especially when friends come in from out of town to play with us Charleston Ladies! My friend Allison and I went to Charlotte, NC for the Fourth of July and so it was only fair to host the Charlotte Boys! What were we thinking? I'm still wearing my sunglasses around inside. Well that and because I look wicked cool. Just saying...

The boys started infiltrating Charleston on Friday afternoon and the town was destroyed by Sunday morning. It all started off with a calm dinner at Poe's Tavern on Sullivan's Island with Phil since Allison decided to ditch us for Sean Brock's (of McCrady's Downtown) crab something something at a social event she went to. She later begged us to join her and Erica- and to bring alcohol. She made the right request because we arrived at the Battery with Tequila and Chips with Salsa. Yum. So we sat on the front porch indulging in some margaritas while making fun of Phil and Banks for their accents. Which transformed into Banks freaking out because he thought we voted for Bush. Does he remember we're from Massachusetts? After being entertained by the way they say the letter "W", we rallied the troops and headed downtown! We survived Banks' crazy road skills and hopped around a few places on King Street before landing at Trio for some dancing. I am thankful that I was super sober that night because I wouldn't have been able to recall all the crazy events if I wasn't! 

Hunter and Kate

Gilroy's is the place to go on King Street if you want super greasy pizza at ungodly hours of the night. So we reassembled over some pepperoni pizza and got our head counts before we left downtown. Thank God for girls with Drama because we had PLENTY to watch thanks to Banks supplying us with some girls who claimed they gave a friend of ours their car keys. Which meant they couldn't get home until they found him. So...we took them home with us to get their keys! As my friend Suzanne would say- Oiy. Got there, handed over their stuff (purses/towels etc) and we snuggled on Allison's bed for a few before the K House (My House) group headed back to Mount Perfect. Cue loud banging on the front door. Door is answered. Girls are back demanding their keys, again. Long story short- the keys fell out of a purse down at Folly Beach (approx 20 mins away)  and some bartender at some hotel apparently has them. Awesome. After some problem solving, AAA is called to pop the trunk because there are apparently keys in there. Which means they've just got to play the waiting game for a bit. As the K House group leaves we notice that they are sleeping in the street. Literally. Towels spread out. Snuggled in the street. I don't know what happened after that, but I do know they got back home safely. 

Banks, Myself, Phil

Saturday Morning. Well- we were all supposed to go to the Farmer's Market in Marion Square for Crepes but since we all got to bed at like 4am we vetoed that plan and caught a few more minutes of sleep. We had a beach party planned for the afternoon and so we spent the morning finding ways to bring alcohol to the beach. Mission accomplished. In true beach clique fashion- some ladies lounged in chairs gossiping, some beachy people played bocce ball, and the men did manly things. Like practiced Kiteboarding. I have to admit- it was pretty cool watching the Charlotte boys maneuver their kite around in figure 8's. But we all know what happens when boys play- someone gets hurt. Phil narrowly missed getting his face, legs, neck whatever else, taken off by the kite thanks to the crazy wind we were having. He escaped with a mark across his face that makes him look like the Joker from Batman. I can talk about this because A) he told people I did it, and B) because it is going to go away and I won't feel guilty about putting it in my blog. Well that and when we went swimming I almost drowned- until I stood up. Whose fault was this?! Ahem, exactly. 

Allison, Me, Phil, Erica, Morgan

Anyways- Cue black skies. Party disperses. And guess what? We can't find Hunter or Banks- who have what? Someones keys. Again. So Phil, Sarah, and myself retreat back to Poe's Tavern for some dinner and plan our night while we wait for the boys to answer one of our 50 phone calls. Who gets the first returned phone call? That's right- Sweet Karen. They showed up at Poe's, inhaled some burgers with us, and planned the night to come.

Sarah, Phil, Me, Banks at Poe's Tavern

Saturday Night. I should just call it Tequila Night. I made Margarita's and chili cheese dip at my house and had everyone over. The men played Wii for a while, the girls funneled margaritas, and then we sat around chatting for a bit. Biggest topic of conversation? What was the worst lie you've ever told? Somehow I don't think scratching your name into someone else's Gameboy counts as the worst lie you've told, Banks, but who am I to judge. So I posed the question- what is the nicest thing you've ever done for anyone? Apparently no one in the group does nice things, aside from me of course. The crew headed out to Shem Creek and landed at Infuzions to see the Atlanta Falcons. I didn't see one Falcon but there were a few people that saw my panties after I had tucked my dress into them. Super! Thankfully the hostess open field tackled me and saved me from even more embarrassment. I was more thankful when I arrived at the table to find a tequila martini that was freaking amazing. I did later confess to unknowingly shaking my booty for the waiting room. Moving on, to Red's Ice House! Not typically a late night establishment but they were happy to see us. They were even more happy to serve us tequila shots and Corona's. I blame Phil for telepathically telling me to pour a tequila shot into my Corona. I may or may not have shoved some contraband into Banks' pocket that spawned some heavy confusion. I know for sure we laughed for like 20 minutes before relocating and making friends at the bar. Or enemies since the boys were mad the band was closing up and Red's closes earlier than downtown (since it's not a late night establishment!). I don't remember who- but someone was talking about building a house out of recycled goods I think. Fast Forward. Our DD dropped the K House crew off and when we eventually went to bed- I'm pretty sure I snored myself to sleep. Which never happens. For the record. 

Sunday Morning. I woke up feeling sick. Ate some crackers and drank some Coke. Played with Nova and Murphy for a while. And then went back to bed. We celebrated our survival at the Charleston Cafe which was formally the Bookstore when it was downtown. The Charleston Cafe is amazing. Everyone we take there LOVES it. Can you blame them? Negative. AND there was No Line! That's right! When you sleep until noon you don't have to fight with the church crowd at 9am! We may have needed to have taken up space at our favorite pew but we failed to do so. Oh well. 

I once again failed to take my camera out of my purse. I really need to get better at that! So I've taken it upon myself to steal everyone else's pictures! Compliments to those who are on top of saving memories in picture form. I preserve them in blog form. Oh- You're Welcome! 

Morgan, Kate, Allison, Sarah, and Moi at Trio

Yay for Professional Kudos!

All of the Speech and Language Pathologists I've worked with, studied with, done research with, or collaborated ideas with have been fabulous. I work for a very cool company that prides itself on being better than the best. Perfect fit for me, Right?! This past semester/quarter of work was quite stressful. I've had crazy cases all year long but one case in particular brought out several big guns with lots of ammo. I entered and left each meeting thinking "don't screw up, don't screw up." As a first year therapist I was still learning the ins and outs of the system as well as transferring what I learned in school to my practices. I'm from Massachusetts and worked in the system for 2 years, relocated to Georgia for graduate school and learned their laws, and started my first year of employment in South Carolina. I had a lot of standards, rules, regulations, and criteria to re-learn and I was always worried I was thinking I had the wrong states regulations on my brain. With a lot of help I managed to make it through my first year. This doesn't mean I won't land in court but at least I still have my license for now right!! 

My Moment of Fame on the front page of my companies website!: (Um- I'm Wicked excited about this incase you didn't pick up on it!)

Kudos to Karen Astin and a team of therapists from a school Director in SC:  "I don't think I have ever been prouder of a team than I was today.  You guys did an awesome job on the evaluation.  It was a comprehensive report.  Your presentation "oozed" with knowledge and confidence! Our children are lucky to have all of you.  Keep up the good work."

Paint Yo Feelingz

A few posts ago I stated that I was going to buy a painting for over my bed. I've had a particular painting in mind, that I absolutely love, but felt it was too sentimental for right now. A friend of mine suggested that perhaps I paint something myself to match the colors and decor of my room. Brilliant! So instead of watching soap operas and eating Rainbow Chip Frosting out of the container, which is completely HEAVENLY I might add, I got busy on my art project! It was requested that I use this art project to reflect on some mixed feelings I might be having. I can't be sure, but this could be a painting of my feelings if you're following those guidelines.

First- Make sure you have help. You can't go through life without a little help now and then.

Second- Build your easel. Any good artist is going to need an easel to paint on. And since we all know I'm a fabulous artist- I damn well needed an easel!

Third- Blank Canvas meets Paint. I kind of like this actually. Quite artsy. 

Forth- Paint it Red. Two coats please!

Fifth- Fire your help if they aren't helping. Take note to Miss Thang passed out in the background. Brat.

Sixth- Apply feelings with a fluid motion. And by fluid motion I mean whip the paint at the canvas as hard as you can. You can scream if you need to. 

Seventh- Hang your Masterpieces! Shut up- that's as even as they're going to get. 

Eighth- Find something else to do with your life for next week. Suggestions Welcome. Am I supposed to sign my artwork? Hmm...

4th of July in Charlotte, NC

The Adventures of Karen and Allison.

After packing the car with the bare essentials: Tequila, Firefly Sweet Tea Vodka, Pillows, Panties, Sunblock, Hats, Diet Coke, Chips, Goldfish and Cute dresses- We took off in search of Charlotte, NC. 

Along the way we smelled bacon, told funny stories, planned events, heard engagement news (yay Kelsey and Stephan!), and said "I love this song" a million times. Yes, we smelled bacon. 

We found ourselves at a vacant CVS, searched for a Publix that didn't exist, and ate at Five Guys Burgers (drool). When we finally arrived at the Lake House we were relieved! We were specifically instructed to "Call Phil" for directions. Did we call Phil? No way. I did text Phil as we were walking down the driveway to say we had gotten there safely and that there was some red car in the driveway. As Allison opened the back door that was "left unlocked for us" and we walked inside the house, Phil responded with "Um, there's no red car there." YIIIIKES. 

Thankfully, like most boys, he was wrong because we quickly found a picture of him in a bikini on the mantel as well as other fun moments the boys had found themselves in. Sorry for the "Bus," Phil! Anyways- back to my story! After some relaxing and unpacking/snacking we headed to downtown Charlotte. 

After wondering around "Alive After Five" looking for Phil and Friends we finally teamed up and went bar hopping. Round One was at The Fox and Hound where a Michael Jackson Karaoke night was in full swing! Round Two was at the Brick and Barrel where this Homeless Vet was getting his groove on (dude he was way better than I am!). And all of the final rounds were at Alley Cat where Tim got us a hook up to get in! Lots of fun, lots of dancing. I may or may not have seen some dudes livelihood- I can't be sure since NO ONE ELSE SAW. Ugh- You people are hopeless!

The next day was a pool party and boat day! We went and hung out by a friends pool, ate some hot dogs, played some pool, and went home to recuperate! Tim and Phil then steered the boat while we went for a ride and watched the sunset. We docked at Tbonez and had supper and some drinks while we watched wasted boaters zoom around. This guy, that I named Mike Smith, was tanked and trying to dock his boat. For what? A beer. After Mike Smith was long gone we headed home to play a few rounds of "Guess that Song." I clearly won.

Happy Fourth of July!! We started off the day getting into our swim suits, packing the boat, mixing drinks, and making mixed cds! Cruised out to the Sandbar, blew up the float, threw it in the water- and JUMPED ON! Aside from having to pee in the water- Lots of fun! Even mooning people everytime I jumped back on the float was entertaining. I should have gotten a tattoo on my tail end because I swear no one has seen my rear that much- EVER. There was a creeper who pulled up to the sandbar with his video camera. He was all alone in his boat. Allison spotted him with his hand down his pants. I try not to think about it. The rest of the 4th was great too. Lots of fireworks, and cooking out while meeting new people. 

The last day of the trip Allison and I got up and went searching for some surprises for our Hosts! We met up with Phil downtown to have lunch and scope out his place. Landed back at the Lake House to catch up with Hunter and Banks. We of course filled them in on all the fun. People getting arrested, mooned, wasted, rotting potatoes, and the people we had met. 

I figured I should post some fun pictures of our trip! Allison and I both had a BLAST and are looking forward to our next trip up! I am SURE everyone is looking forward to our return because they practically cried when we left. I saw tears. Seriously.

The Torture of Time

Time heals all.

Time moves slowly.

Time is on my side.

Time keeps on ticking.

This is the time to remember.

Remember the time.

Time changes things.

Just give it Time.

Killing time.

Time of My Life.

Time After Time.

Wasting Time.

The first Time.

It's not my Time.

Only Time Will Tell.

Do you mark time? I do. It's not something I do on purpose, but it is something I frequently torture myself with. Six years ago on April 1st I stopped running. A month ago I was home in Massachusetts. 6 months ago last week I went on vacation. Three years ago I got accepted into graduate school. Time time time. Always haunting me. Lately, I've been drowning in my old memories. Both insignificant and life altering. It must be a popular month because I feel like I'm always thinking "a year ago today I...." I don't know what makes me think of the date that I went parasailing, the first time I went to Magnolia's, the first time I ran the bridge, or the first time I did CPR on a patient- but these things just keep floating around my head. 

A best friend of mine also seems to be suffering from this "Time Torture," especially today. Which got me thinking- Why should we struggle with a certain day just because a year ago our heart was broken, or our life changed because of something that happened? It's not like it's someones damn birthday. My dad's birthday (whom I call Ernie) was last week. On his birthday I did not sit there and think "Hmm 53 years ago Ernie was born." No way- that'd be lame-o and creepy. Especially since I swear he has to only be 45.  And yet I still sit here thinking about these moments of my life that have passed me. For some of them I laugh, others I ache. Maybe it's just like a self checking system- you know- to keep my life on the right path. Who knows. I can't say it's unhealthy to reflect upon these moments, but I also can't state with certainty that it has any positive affects on the soul either. Who am I to decide?

Someone recently advised me to live in the present- not the future, nor the past. I've been actively trying to do this with every ounce of me and you know what? It's not easy. But I do agree that it's the right way to live. I went for a drive tonight to think about his advice because I was having a difficult time grasping it. I don't think we should "forget" our past- but we can't live in it. We can't live that life because it's in the past for a reason. Our past events have already molded us- whether we like it or not. We also can't live in the future because we have no way to grab ahold of it. I can timeline the Hell out of my "future" and the life I want but just because I think I should be married with kids when I'm XYZ doesn't mean life will unravel that way. I know huh? Rats! 

Is it time to let Time move along on it's own? I think so.

There are days it feels like yesterday, and days it feels like it was a million years ago... Always in my heart... xoxo

"When I look to the sky, something tells me you're here with me. And you make everything alright. I can always find my way when you are near."- Train

Because I think it says exactly how I'm feeling: When I Look to the Sky- Music/Video  Lyrics

                                            

                                                        Sunset over the Cooper River